The revisions of my novel have been accepted by my publisher and my book "The Lake House" has moved into production. Less than a year from now I will hold my book in my hand. It's an exciting time as I make decisions about a second book, follow the progression of my story's publication and revel in the joy of my accomplishment. Next week I will travel to New York to spend my birthday at the beach with a friend and then will be staying to spend time at Book Expo America and do a little partying to celebrate Foundry Literary agency's five year anniversary. Today, as I was driving from Napa to Santa Rosa along beautiful HWY 12 I looked at the rolling hills dotted with trees, the vineyards that stretch for miles, and the impressive wineries built like castles and realized how much my life has changed since making my list of dreams. Four years ago, I drove this same road and though I noticed the beauty I couldn't take it in. My heart was broken, my life a mess, and I remember begging a higher power to make the pain stop. I haven't been on this road since that day, but the view from within looked drastically different today.
On my return drive I stopped in Sonoma and sat in the park at the tree where I made my plea, "Please, God help me remember what happiness feels like. All around me were families, lovers, and children screaming with joy. I felt alone, lost, and scared. Something told me to make a list of all the times I'd been happy in my life. Then without knowing why I began to wonder what my life would look like if there were no rules, limitation, and if I didn't fear failure. I had no idea at that time as I made my list of dreams, that my life would become so magnificent that my tears would turn to those of immense gratitude.
I realize that the reason my life changed that day was because I began to say, "yes." The rule when I started this journey was to settle for nothing less than magnificence and to seize every opportunity that came to me. By saying, "yes" the doors began to open. I began to be amazed at all the dreams that came true in such a brief time frame.
The strange thing about this journey is that I realized in the last couple of years I've begun to hesitate when it comes to opportunities placed in front of me. I had the chance to go to New York for my birthday and it took me weeks to make the decision. Somehow trepidation and worry have snuck back in. Instead of booking travel to the places in the world I still want to see, I research and then don't make the final move to make reservations.
But the great thing about life is that every moment we have a chance to better ourselves, realize what's holding us back, and charge forward. Next week when I return from New York I'm beginning Tango classes. I will book a trip to somewhere on my list. But for this moment, I'm going to curl against the tree where I first made my list and revel in all the greatness that has come to me.
Say, "yes" to your dreams, the opportunities, the love, the chances, and watch how life becomes a living miracle.